Why I Hate Change
The New Year is almost upon us, and it beckons for change. For reasons almost too mystical to understand, human beings perceive a new number at the end of the year as a benchmark for changing habits and beginning new endeavors. But for most of us, few changes will actually stick.
There is a good reason you don't change, at least not as often as you'd like. In fact, there are millions of them. They're called neurons, and the way they interact is an accurate predictor of your behavioral tendencies. There's a great deal of science behind this idea, but here are ten reasons I can identify why I personally don't make changes in my life as often as I prefer.
I like routine.
I like familiar.
I like safety.
I like my fears.
I like my biases.
I like my assumptions.
I like those who like me.
I like predictable outcomes.
I like predictable rewards.
I like familiar modes of gratification.
The anatomy of change
Whenever we happen upon an idea or impulse that incites us to change, our brains are stimulated in a unique way that scientists don't fully understand. These instances, often called epiphanies or somatic markers, represent the ideal conduit for behavioral changes.
Take, for example, an IT manager who would like to do a better job of meeting face to face with other firm employees. One day she reads a blog posting that inspires her to be more proactive in this area. The IT manager senses an inner glow of satisfaction upon choosing a new course of action, but now she has to make a decision.
She must now take action in order to fully execute the idea, but it won't necessarily be easy to do so. In fact, as time goes by she may attempt to talk herself out of it. Scientific research suggests that the brain physically resists behavioral changes. The good news is that there’s a workaround for this. It involves a few simple steps backed by research, and time invested in these can make short and long term goals for change become reality.
1. Practice thought, which will change behavior
In order to make a lasting change, you must do a wipe of the area of your mind's "hard drive" that keeps you in a rut. But you must also fill the vacuum left there by filling it with new behaviors or thinking. So, for example, whenever you start to believe something is not possible, consult a pre-prepared list of reasons why it can -- and should – happen, or force yourself to do it until it feels natural. In so doing, you actually change the chemistry of your brain.
2. Be a little crazy—talk to yourself
Ask yourself questions. How will I make this change? What steps are involved? What rewards will I reap? Keep yourself focused on intrinsic rewards. How good will it feel to finally take control of your time? Implement a new workflow process? Master a new programming language? Record a timeline of milestones in your effort to change if that helps. The most important thing is to keep the idea front and center.
3. Educate yourself
One of the best ways to make a lasting change is to educate yourself. Learn all you can about whatever it is you need to know to implement change. Doing so will reinforce your new course of action and keep you focused on the change. Take it in small bites. If you try to learn everything at once, you may be overcome by the perceived amount of information. Proceed slowly, and soak in all you can.
4. Give yourself a break
Change is hard. Be gentle with yourself when you falter. But don't forget to pick yourself back up. Persistence is one of the most intrinsically rewarding traits, even if it doesn't always guarantee that you reach the desired outcome. In fact, merely persisting in an endeavor to change can often be the catalyst for other, more significant changes. The IT manager who desires to do a better job in face to face meetings might be received initially with resistance from her employees. By allowing for occasional disappointments (“if at first you don’t succeed, try, try and try again”) not only will she have more realistic expectations and rewards about dealing with employees, she may also develop an enhanced ability to deal with total strangers.
5. Hold onto hope
Human beings are hard-wired to respond in specific ways to specific stimuli. Often only the hope for change will drive out the despair we feel from good intentions left unfulfilled. But the good news is that we can change. While certain work habits are also hard to break, we can get accustomed to operating in a new way. Make the effort, and reap the rewards.
